Revenge
Chapter 1
Introductions
My name is Hannah.
I am the Guardian.
For well over three hundred years now, I have wandered the earth looking after as well as destroying the Crudelitas — the supernatural beings that have walked Earth with us since the dawn of time; the vampires, werewolves, witches, the fairies, mermaids and the nephilim. It's a tough job but someone's got to do it, and at the moment that someone is me. In a few years it will become the responsibility of my children as well, but for now it's just me on my own and I'll do everything in my power to keep my children protected from it for as long as I possibly can.
You may wonder how I came by such a huge responsibility. Well, it's simple really; I was born to it, it was always my destiny from the minute of my birth. It had been the same too, for my mother before me and for her mother before her. We have always been the Venatorcustos, it has been a legacy passed down from mother to daughter since the birth of time.
My children don't know who I am, and I have no intentions of telling them until I have to. What mother would want their kids growing up knowing that the monsters lurking under their bed are actually real? Just because I know the truth as it stands, it doesn't mean they should know it too. I want them to have a normal childhood, at least a normal as possible under the circumstances. And, aside from Alex believing that fairies and mermaids are real — due to a couple of past close encounters — it’s working out pretty well, although they are still only very young and we still have a long way to go. I still can't help but worry occasionally though, whether I am making the right choices.
Alex is a headstrong six year old; she takes after me in temperament, but with her long blonde hair, deep blue eyes and her Cherubic face, she looks more like an angel. It's a pity that she doesn't act like one though. She began acting out about the same time she started school. Although the counsellors claimed it had nothing to do with school, and was more likely to be delayed grief from the loss of her father when she was still a toddler. The more I thought about it though, the more I tend to think it's just her personality. I think it's more of that stubborn streak that presents itself so predominantly on regular occasions. But, if I was going to be truthful, I'd have to admit she probably gets that from me; I've definitely been known for my stubborn streak as well.
Michael was my husband, and Alex's father. He had been killed in a car accident about three years earlier. He had been my only mortal husband in over three hundred years and, even though I'd loved him, it was nothing compared to the love I felt for Gabriel.
Gabriel, we had only learned recently, is Kyle's father and he’s also my oldest friend. Kyle was conceived just after Michael's death, and has Gabriel's blond curls and piercing blue eyes. He is still little more than a toddler, but one day he would become the strongest Guardian to have ever existed, and the first ever Male of our kind. Although the main reason for his strength and abilities is because his father is a vampire, and even though the vampire gene is still dormant in his system for now— when he becomes Guardian— it will make him the greatest of our kind. In the meantime, while both my children are so young and vulnerable, I will protect them with all that I have, and I refuse to let the supernatural beings even know of their existence; except, of course, for a few exceptions.
~
It has only been a couple of weeks since I had foolishly agreed to go swimming with the mermaids. They had taken me at the bequest of the angels to an underwater cave — that I had to drown to get into I might add — where I had met with my mother, Susannah. Upon her death she had become a part of the angels and, although I knew she was with the angels, I hadn't realised she was actually a part of their collective consciousness. She had given me answers to questions I had only dreamed of having answered, including the fact that Gabriel was Kyle's father and that I wasn't going to be joining the angels in death any time soon. In the past there had only ever been one Guardian at a time, and with Alex to take my place, I believed my time on Earth was drawing to a close. Apparently, the angels were now of the belief that because there were so many Crudelitas on the earth, they really needed at least a couple of guardians to maintain the level of control they wanted. So instead of me dying after Alex reached adulthood, I would live on and oversee the guardians. This was good news, as far as I was concerned; even after three hundred years I still wasn’t ready to die. But, even better was the knowledge that I was permitted to love a Crudelitas. I had been brought up to believe that the Guardian could never be with one of the Crudelitas and, after centuries of trying to deny my feelings for Gabriel, I was finally permitted to be with him and to love him openly and honestly; without fear of retribution or retaliation. Gabriel had been my best friend when I was growing up in the late seventeenth century. He was there for me when I accepted my destiny as the Venatorcustas. And again, when I experienced firsthand my mother’s death as she was burned alive at the stake for witchcraft; our supernatural connection meant that I had felt everything she had gone through while she was burning to death. Gabriel was there for me the whole way through.
And yet, when I woke up and Gabriel was lying quietly beside me, watching me, I was annoyed. I should have been elated at having him with me, but instead I was frustrated.
"Hi gorgeous!" Gabriel said, with a smile widening across his face and lighting up the deep blue of his eyes. "Have I told you how lucky I am today?"
"How Gabriel? How could you have told me today? I’ve only just woken up," I snapped, "to you glaring at me again, no less!"
"Hannah?" he questioned slowly, cautiously.
"What?" I snapped again.
"What's wrong?" his face clouded over with anxiety.
I just shook my head in reply. What was wrong with me? All I really wanted to do was snuggle in closer to him and press my body against his. Why was I picking a fight instead?
"I don't like waking up every morning with you glaring at me. It makes me uncomfortable."
"What?" he sat up beside me and glared down at me. "I make you uncomfortable? After waiting for you for almost three hundred and fifty years, you’re telling me I make you uncomfortable?"
I reached for him, just to touch him, but he pulled away too quickly, shifted off of the bed and stood on the other side of the room.
"Gabe, please don't." I begged.
"Look Hannah, I know this is sudden; it didn't matter what you felt before, because you couldn't have me anyway. Now you can and if you don't want to just be honest with me Hannah, let me know where I stand. Please?"
He returned to the edge of the bed.
"This isn't about us Gabriel; it's about me being uncomfortable with you pretending to sleep beside me every night, when I know you have other things you could be doing."
"Hannah, there is absolutely nothing I would rather be doing, not ever."
"But I don't like it."
"Ok, fair enough." Gabriel sighed.
"What if we try this then? I'll get a job working nightshifts at one of the local hospitals. I'll move in here with you for the time being and we can spend the days together; I can work nights while you sleep. We can have the best of both worlds."
No, this is not what I want. I do like sleeping beside Gabriel at night; no, I love it. There isn't much I enjoy more than waking up beside Gabriel each morning. So why was I doing this to myself when my heart kept telling me I was wrong? I patted the bed beside me; he came and sat back down on the edge, encouragement reflected in his eyes.
"Gabriel, you can't move in with me." I said, with a slight shake of my head.
"Why?" he asked quietly. It was so quiet, it was almost a whisper. "What excuse are you going to use now Hannah? You can't use ‘the angels won't allow it’ when you already told me what a fallacy that one was. And, you can't use the "I don't want to hurt Jesse" one because, I hate to break it to you, he’s found someone else Hannah. He and Sam are very happy together now. So what is it? What's your excuse this time? Just keep in mind Hannah, my patience isn't infinite."
I couldn't even look at him. He was right; I had been leading him for so long now and when nothing else stood in my way, I still couldn't commit.
Gabriel misread my silence and, with an exasperated sigh, he stood up and pulled his phone out of his pocket.
"I need a portal..." was all I heard as he walked out of the room.
I was about to get out of the shower ten minutes later, when I heard the en-suite door open quietly and Gabriel spoke into the room without really entering. "I'm going back home Hannah; I've got a lot to sort out and think about. Call me when you work out what you want. But just remember, this isn’t only about you and me anymore!"
"Gabe I..." I started, but the door was already closed and I heard the familiar quiet whooshing sound that signified the portal in my wardrobe being used.
I sat down in the shower with the hot water washing over me, and waited for the tears to come flooding.
I dried myself off and got dressed before walking back out into my bedroom to find Bernard sitting on the corner of my bed. The look on his face was anything but inviting, and he shook his head at me.
"What? I didn't do anything. Why's it always my fault?"
"Why do you always assume I think it's your fault?"
"Because you’re sitting there, shaking your head at me. What am I supposed to think?"
He sighed.
"What happened then?" he asked.
"Nothing; I don't want him to move in with me that's all. I can't make that commitment just yet. I need to give the kids a chance to get to know him. When they're comfortable, then I'll be comfortable but until then Bernard, I'm just not interested."
"So you just kicked him out?"
"No. He left. All I did was to say that I didn't want to move in with him; I didn't expect him to just up and leave."
Bernard patted the bed beside him, and I went and sat down next to him. He was my true biological father, and the only constant I had in my three hundred and fifty years of life. I had met him when I was seventeen, when my mother died. She had sent me to him for protection because she had loved him and trusted him, although I didn't know he was my father at the time. That was a fact I had only learnt a few months ago; although I suspect Bernard might have at least suspected the truth from the beginning.
He put his arm around my shoulder and pulled me in tight.
"So call him now and sort it out."
"I will Bernard, I just need some time. I just really need to be clear in my mind about what I want. I came back from the meeting with Susannah and we haven't been apart since."
"Hannah, I know you don't want anything other than Gabriel. What is there to think about?"
"Whether it's the right thing for the kids for starters? I need to know that I'm doing the right thing by them. I never promised Gabriel he could just move in with me. I need time, that's all. I’ll call him later, Ok?"
"Alright then, but see that you call him sooner, rather than later."
I nodded. He kissed me softly on the forehead before activating the portal and leaving.
~
I went into the kitchen, filled the kettle up with some water before putting it on to boil. It was still early enough that Mum and the kids were still sleeping, and Sam hadn't even shown up yet, so I just sat quietly and enjoyed my coffee while I thought about what to do about Gabriel.
It wasn't that I didn't want to be with him, because I did with all my heart, but I wasn't ready to have him move in with me on a full time basis. I wanted to start at the beginning and maybe just date for a little while. I know he lived a long way away, but that didn't mean we couldn't make it work. We did have the convenience of a portal. But now there was Kyle to consider too, and what was best for him.
Sam came in while I was finishing up my coffee.
"Kids still asleep?" she asked cautiously. I nodded in reply, still lost in my own thoughts.
She looked around suspiciously.
"Where's Gabe?" she asked eventually.
"Gone home." I answered absently.
"Hannah? What's going on?" she pressed.
"He went back home."
"Why?"
"Not now Sam, I'm really not up for it."
"Hannah, what did you do?" she asked cautiously.
"Please Sam."
She turned on me, "Damn it Hannah, what's your problem? You finally snag the man of your dreams and you ruin it. What have you done?"
"I didn't do anything Sam."
"Then why did he just leave?"
I sighed. "I said I didn't want him to move in with me."
Sam just looked at me for a minute, her mouth slightly agape. Then she composed herself and started into a tirade. "Why would you tell him that? What's your problem? Why not? Hannah, call him right now and sort this out. Tell him you reconsidered and you want him back."
"What? No Sam. I don't want to live with him." I got up and put my coffee cup in the sink before walking away, hoping to end the conversation. Sam just got up and followed me; she wasn’t ready to let it drop yet.
"Hannah, you've kept him waiting over three hundred years. Don't you think that's long enough to wait before moving in with someone?"
"Sam, we've been together not even three weeks. That's nowhere near long enough to know if things will be alright with the kids. And, even if it was, I don't care. I'm not having him move in with me just because everybody else thinks I should."
She looked at me thoughtfully for a few seconds, and then her eyes lit up as she made some sort of connection in her head. "You want to marry him first!"
"What? No! Sam, where do you get these ridiculous notions from?"
She shook her head. "You’re still just that old fashioned girl; you don't want to live with him, you want to marry him." She smiled.
"No Sam. That's not it." I hadn't even thought about marrying Gabriel, not that it was a bad thought at all, but I wasn't ready to marry him now even if he asked.
"Just ask him Hannah, he'll be happy to oblige. I'll ask him for you."
"You’ll do no such thing, Sam. Don't you dare! I will never forgive you if you do such a thing."
"Yeah, you would, you'd thank me for it." she contradicted.
"Sam, I mean it. I'm warning you now, if you do something so stupid it would be the end of us because he'd never forgive me if I then told him no."
Sam's attitude changed instantly when she realized I wasn't joking. "You are a fool Hannah. Do something about it now, or I'm going back to Estonia. I'm not hanging around here, watching you sulk and mope about the place."
She continued to shake her head at me as she walked away.
~
Sam had been my best friend for so long now; I was the cause of her becoming a vampire, so I took her under my wing when she was first created and she has been a loyal friend ever since. But sometimes she can't just leave well enough alone. I loved her to death, I suppose literally, but that didn't give her a right to tell me what I wanted. I was, and always will be, the only one who can decide what I want. And, even if the very thought of Gabriel on one knee asking me to marry him has my heart all a flutter, I still wouldn't say yes. Not yet anyway; not until the kids have a chance to get to know him, to accept him and to love him as I do.
I didn't call Gabriel, despite the constant nagging from Sam and my Mum. But Sam didn't go back to Estonia either; even though she really missed Jesse, she knew I needed her at the moment. With Mum almost on her death bed, and problems brewing with the Nephilim back in America, she knew I needed all the help I could get and, despite being angry with me, she wouldn’t ever desert me; she knew I knew it, so she just continued to give me the cold shoulder instead.
~
Gabriel broke before I did. He called me about three days later, but after three nights of next to no sleep, my nerves were wearing pretty thin and I wasn't about to tolerate being told what to do.
"Hi Hannah." he said, as soon as I answered the phone. "Are you talking to me yet?"
I was determined not to lose my temper with him. "I was never, not talking to you Gabriel; you’re the one who walked out, out of the room then out of the country."
"I said to call me!" he replied impatiently.
"When I knew what I wanted!" I retorted. "Gabriel, I am really tired. I haven't slept very well since you left, so if there is something you need ok, but if you are just going to hassle me, then please don't."
"So you don't know what you want then, Hannah?" he asked, the trepidation in his voice seeping through.
I sighed and said quietly, "I want you Gabriel."
I heard his quiet intake of breath. "But?"
"I'm not ready to live with you, that's all. I want the kids to be comfortable with you before I make that commitment."
I could all but hear the thoughts clicking over in his mind.
"That's what this is all about?" he chuckled. "After three hundred years, we're going too fast?"
"Don't laugh at me Gabriel, this isn't about us. This is about the kids."
"I'm not laughing at you Hannah; I'm chuckling in relief, and at the irony of it. Honestly, I’ve waited this long. Do you think I can't wait a few more months, especially when I'm not actually waiting? If I know you’re mine, I'm happy to play the boyfriend role. I've been waiting for this for far longer than you can imagine; well before that day I kissed you."
"So you’re ok with that?" I just needed confirmation.
"Uh-huh; even better than ok. That is the best idea yet. I've almost finalized everything here. I'll get a job and my own place over there with you and we’ll date, have occasional sleepovers and I can court you like I had always wanted to. Well, sort of anyway."
I smiled to myself. "So, when will you be back then?"
I could hear the smile in Gabriel's voice as he replied, "I'd like to say give me five, but I’m going to be practical. I'm just going to finish up here first, so I'll be a few more days; I was gone too long and have a bit to sort out. Do you want to start looking for a place over there for me, something you'd really like?"
I wasn’t going to be able to get rid of this smile on my face for a while now.
"How much do you want to spend Gabe?"
"No budget Hannah, whatever it costs to get something you really like."
My thoughts were already ticking over; something close to the beach would be nice, the kids would love that, but a leafy suburb so Gabe could go out whenever he wanted. I was happy now; this was exactly what I wanted.
"I love you, Gabriel." I said.
"And I you, with all my heart Hannah; forever and always. See you soon." he replied.
####
Introductions
My name is Hannah.
I am the Guardian.
For well over three hundred years now, I have wandered the earth looking after as well as destroying the Crudelitas — the supernatural beings that have walked Earth with us since the dawn of time; the vampires, werewolves, witches, the fairies, mermaids and the nephilim. It's a tough job but someone's got to do it, and at the moment that someone is me. In a few years it will become the responsibility of my children as well, but for now it's just me on my own and I'll do everything in my power to keep my children protected from it for as long as I possibly can.
You may wonder how I came by such a huge responsibility. Well, it's simple really; I was born to it, it was always my destiny from the minute of my birth. It had been the same too, for my mother before me and for her mother before her. We have always been the Venatorcustos, it has been a legacy passed down from mother to daughter since the birth of time.
My children don't know who I am, and I have no intentions of telling them until I have to. What mother would want their kids growing up knowing that the monsters lurking under their bed are actually real? Just because I know the truth as it stands, it doesn't mean they should know it too. I want them to have a normal childhood, at least a normal as possible under the circumstances. And, aside from Alex believing that fairies and mermaids are real — due to a couple of past close encounters — it’s working out pretty well, although they are still only very young and we still have a long way to go. I still can't help but worry occasionally though, whether I am making the right choices.
Alex is a headstrong six year old; she takes after me in temperament, but with her long blonde hair, deep blue eyes and her Cherubic face, she looks more like an angel. It's a pity that she doesn't act like one though. She began acting out about the same time she started school. Although the counsellors claimed it had nothing to do with school, and was more likely to be delayed grief from the loss of her father when she was still a toddler. The more I thought about it though, the more I tend to think it's just her personality. I think it's more of that stubborn streak that presents itself so predominantly on regular occasions. But, if I was going to be truthful, I'd have to admit she probably gets that from me; I've definitely been known for my stubborn streak as well.
Michael was my husband, and Alex's father. He had been killed in a car accident about three years earlier. He had been my only mortal husband in over three hundred years and, even though I'd loved him, it was nothing compared to the love I felt for Gabriel.
Gabriel, we had only learned recently, is Kyle's father and he’s also my oldest friend. Kyle was conceived just after Michael's death, and has Gabriel's blond curls and piercing blue eyes. He is still little more than a toddler, but one day he would become the strongest Guardian to have ever existed, and the first ever Male of our kind. Although the main reason for his strength and abilities is because his father is a vampire, and even though the vampire gene is still dormant in his system for now— when he becomes Guardian— it will make him the greatest of our kind. In the meantime, while both my children are so young and vulnerable, I will protect them with all that I have, and I refuse to let the supernatural beings even know of their existence; except, of course, for a few exceptions.
~
It has only been a couple of weeks since I had foolishly agreed to go swimming with the mermaids. They had taken me at the bequest of the angels to an underwater cave — that I had to drown to get into I might add — where I had met with my mother, Susannah. Upon her death she had become a part of the angels and, although I knew she was with the angels, I hadn't realised she was actually a part of their collective consciousness. She had given me answers to questions I had only dreamed of having answered, including the fact that Gabriel was Kyle's father and that I wasn't going to be joining the angels in death any time soon. In the past there had only ever been one Guardian at a time, and with Alex to take my place, I believed my time on Earth was drawing to a close. Apparently, the angels were now of the belief that because there were so many Crudelitas on the earth, they really needed at least a couple of guardians to maintain the level of control they wanted. So instead of me dying after Alex reached adulthood, I would live on and oversee the guardians. This was good news, as far as I was concerned; even after three hundred years I still wasn’t ready to die. But, even better was the knowledge that I was permitted to love a Crudelitas. I had been brought up to believe that the Guardian could never be with one of the Crudelitas and, after centuries of trying to deny my feelings for Gabriel, I was finally permitted to be with him and to love him openly and honestly; without fear of retribution or retaliation. Gabriel had been my best friend when I was growing up in the late seventeenth century. He was there for me when I accepted my destiny as the Venatorcustas. And again, when I experienced firsthand my mother’s death as she was burned alive at the stake for witchcraft; our supernatural connection meant that I had felt everything she had gone through while she was burning to death. Gabriel was there for me the whole way through.
And yet, when I woke up and Gabriel was lying quietly beside me, watching me, I was annoyed. I should have been elated at having him with me, but instead I was frustrated.
"Hi gorgeous!" Gabriel said, with a smile widening across his face and lighting up the deep blue of his eyes. "Have I told you how lucky I am today?"
"How Gabriel? How could you have told me today? I’ve only just woken up," I snapped, "to you glaring at me again, no less!"
"Hannah?" he questioned slowly, cautiously.
"What?" I snapped again.
"What's wrong?" his face clouded over with anxiety.
I just shook my head in reply. What was wrong with me? All I really wanted to do was snuggle in closer to him and press my body against his. Why was I picking a fight instead?
"I don't like waking up every morning with you glaring at me. It makes me uncomfortable."
"What?" he sat up beside me and glared down at me. "I make you uncomfortable? After waiting for you for almost three hundred and fifty years, you’re telling me I make you uncomfortable?"
I reached for him, just to touch him, but he pulled away too quickly, shifted off of the bed and stood on the other side of the room.
"Gabe, please don't." I begged.
"Look Hannah, I know this is sudden; it didn't matter what you felt before, because you couldn't have me anyway. Now you can and if you don't want to just be honest with me Hannah, let me know where I stand. Please?"
He returned to the edge of the bed.
"This isn't about us Gabriel; it's about me being uncomfortable with you pretending to sleep beside me every night, when I know you have other things you could be doing."
"Hannah, there is absolutely nothing I would rather be doing, not ever."
"But I don't like it."
"Ok, fair enough." Gabriel sighed.
"What if we try this then? I'll get a job working nightshifts at one of the local hospitals. I'll move in here with you for the time being and we can spend the days together; I can work nights while you sleep. We can have the best of both worlds."
No, this is not what I want. I do like sleeping beside Gabriel at night; no, I love it. There isn't much I enjoy more than waking up beside Gabriel each morning. So why was I doing this to myself when my heart kept telling me I was wrong? I patted the bed beside me; he came and sat back down on the edge, encouragement reflected in his eyes.
"Gabriel, you can't move in with me." I said, with a slight shake of my head.
"Why?" he asked quietly. It was so quiet, it was almost a whisper. "What excuse are you going to use now Hannah? You can't use ‘the angels won't allow it’ when you already told me what a fallacy that one was. And, you can't use the "I don't want to hurt Jesse" one because, I hate to break it to you, he’s found someone else Hannah. He and Sam are very happy together now. So what is it? What's your excuse this time? Just keep in mind Hannah, my patience isn't infinite."
I couldn't even look at him. He was right; I had been leading him for so long now and when nothing else stood in my way, I still couldn't commit.
Gabriel misread my silence and, with an exasperated sigh, he stood up and pulled his phone out of his pocket.
"I need a portal..." was all I heard as he walked out of the room.
I was about to get out of the shower ten minutes later, when I heard the en-suite door open quietly and Gabriel spoke into the room without really entering. "I'm going back home Hannah; I've got a lot to sort out and think about. Call me when you work out what you want. But just remember, this isn’t only about you and me anymore!"
"Gabe I..." I started, but the door was already closed and I heard the familiar quiet whooshing sound that signified the portal in my wardrobe being used.
I sat down in the shower with the hot water washing over me, and waited for the tears to come flooding.
I dried myself off and got dressed before walking back out into my bedroom to find Bernard sitting on the corner of my bed. The look on his face was anything but inviting, and he shook his head at me.
"What? I didn't do anything. Why's it always my fault?"
"Why do you always assume I think it's your fault?"
"Because you’re sitting there, shaking your head at me. What am I supposed to think?"
He sighed.
"What happened then?" he asked.
"Nothing; I don't want him to move in with me that's all. I can't make that commitment just yet. I need to give the kids a chance to get to know him. When they're comfortable, then I'll be comfortable but until then Bernard, I'm just not interested."
"So you just kicked him out?"
"No. He left. All I did was to say that I didn't want to move in with him; I didn't expect him to just up and leave."
Bernard patted the bed beside him, and I went and sat down next to him. He was my true biological father, and the only constant I had in my three hundred and fifty years of life. I had met him when I was seventeen, when my mother died. She had sent me to him for protection because she had loved him and trusted him, although I didn't know he was my father at the time. That was a fact I had only learnt a few months ago; although I suspect Bernard might have at least suspected the truth from the beginning.
He put his arm around my shoulder and pulled me in tight.
"So call him now and sort it out."
"I will Bernard, I just need some time. I just really need to be clear in my mind about what I want. I came back from the meeting with Susannah and we haven't been apart since."
"Hannah, I know you don't want anything other than Gabriel. What is there to think about?"
"Whether it's the right thing for the kids for starters? I need to know that I'm doing the right thing by them. I never promised Gabriel he could just move in with me. I need time, that's all. I’ll call him later, Ok?"
"Alright then, but see that you call him sooner, rather than later."
I nodded. He kissed me softly on the forehead before activating the portal and leaving.
~
I went into the kitchen, filled the kettle up with some water before putting it on to boil. It was still early enough that Mum and the kids were still sleeping, and Sam hadn't even shown up yet, so I just sat quietly and enjoyed my coffee while I thought about what to do about Gabriel.
It wasn't that I didn't want to be with him, because I did with all my heart, but I wasn't ready to have him move in with me on a full time basis. I wanted to start at the beginning and maybe just date for a little while. I know he lived a long way away, but that didn't mean we couldn't make it work. We did have the convenience of a portal. But now there was Kyle to consider too, and what was best for him.
Sam came in while I was finishing up my coffee.
"Kids still asleep?" she asked cautiously. I nodded in reply, still lost in my own thoughts.
She looked around suspiciously.
"Where's Gabe?" she asked eventually.
"Gone home." I answered absently.
"Hannah? What's going on?" she pressed.
"He went back home."
"Why?"
"Not now Sam, I'm really not up for it."
"Hannah, what did you do?" she asked cautiously.
"Please Sam."
She turned on me, "Damn it Hannah, what's your problem? You finally snag the man of your dreams and you ruin it. What have you done?"
"I didn't do anything Sam."
"Then why did he just leave?"
I sighed. "I said I didn't want him to move in with me."
Sam just looked at me for a minute, her mouth slightly agape. Then she composed herself and started into a tirade. "Why would you tell him that? What's your problem? Why not? Hannah, call him right now and sort this out. Tell him you reconsidered and you want him back."
"What? No Sam. I don't want to live with him." I got up and put my coffee cup in the sink before walking away, hoping to end the conversation. Sam just got up and followed me; she wasn’t ready to let it drop yet.
"Hannah, you've kept him waiting over three hundred years. Don't you think that's long enough to wait before moving in with someone?"
"Sam, we've been together not even three weeks. That's nowhere near long enough to know if things will be alright with the kids. And, even if it was, I don't care. I'm not having him move in with me just because everybody else thinks I should."
She looked at me thoughtfully for a few seconds, and then her eyes lit up as she made some sort of connection in her head. "You want to marry him first!"
"What? No! Sam, where do you get these ridiculous notions from?"
She shook her head. "You’re still just that old fashioned girl; you don't want to live with him, you want to marry him." She smiled.
"No Sam. That's not it." I hadn't even thought about marrying Gabriel, not that it was a bad thought at all, but I wasn't ready to marry him now even if he asked.
"Just ask him Hannah, he'll be happy to oblige. I'll ask him for you."
"You’ll do no such thing, Sam. Don't you dare! I will never forgive you if you do such a thing."
"Yeah, you would, you'd thank me for it." she contradicted.
"Sam, I mean it. I'm warning you now, if you do something so stupid it would be the end of us because he'd never forgive me if I then told him no."
Sam's attitude changed instantly when she realized I wasn't joking. "You are a fool Hannah. Do something about it now, or I'm going back to Estonia. I'm not hanging around here, watching you sulk and mope about the place."
She continued to shake her head at me as she walked away.
~
Sam had been my best friend for so long now; I was the cause of her becoming a vampire, so I took her under my wing when she was first created and she has been a loyal friend ever since. But sometimes she can't just leave well enough alone. I loved her to death, I suppose literally, but that didn't give her a right to tell me what I wanted. I was, and always will be, the only one who can decide what I want. And, even if the very thought of Gabriel on one knee asking me to marry him has my heart all a flutter, I still wouldn't say yes. Not yet anyway; not until the kids have a chance to get to know him, to accept him and to love him as I do.
I didn't call Gabriel, despite the constant nagging from Sam and my Mum. But Sam didn't go back to Estonia either; even though she really missed Jesse, she knew I needed her at the moment. With Mum almost on her death bed, and problems brewing with the Nephilim back in America, she knew I needed all the help I could get and, despite being angry with me, she wouldn’t ever desert me; she knew I knew it, so she just continued to give me the cold shoulder instead.
~
Gabriel broke before I did. He called me about three days later, but after three nights of next to no sleep, my nerves were wearing pretty thin and I wasn't about to tolerate being told what to do.
"Hi Hannah." he said, as soon as I answered the phone. "Are you talking to me yet?"
I was determined not to lose my temper with him. "I was never, not talking to you Gabriel; you’re the one who walked out, out of the room then out of the country."
"I said to call me!" he replied impatiently.
"When I knew what I wanted!" I retorted. "Gabriel, I am really tired. I haven't slept very well since you left, so if there is something you need ok, but if you are just going to hassle me, then please don't."
"So you don't know what you want then, Hannah?" he asked, the trepidation in his voice seeping through.
I sighed and said quietly, "I want you Gabriel."
I heard his quiet intake of breath. "But?"
"I'm not ready to live with you, that's all. I want the kids to be comfortable with you before I make that commitment."
I could all but hear the thoughts clicking over in his mind.
"That's what this is all about?" he chuckled. "After three hundred years, we're going too fast?"
"Don't laugh at me Gabriel, this isn't about us. This is about the kids."
"I'm not laughing at you Hannah; I'm chuckling in relief, and at the irony of it. Honestly, I’ve waited this long. Do you think I can't wait a few more months, especially when I'm not actually waiting? If I know you’re mine, I'm happy to play the boyfriend role. I've been waiting for this for far longer than you can imagine; well before that day I kissed you."
"So you’re ok with that?" I just needed confirmation.
"Uh-huh; even better than ok. That is the best idea yet. I've almost finalized everything here. I'll get a job and my own place over there with you and we’ll date, have occasional sleepovers and I can court you like I had always wanted to. Well, sort of anyway."
I smiled to myself. "So, when will you be back then?"
I could hear the smile in Gabriel's voice as he replied, "I'd like to say give me five, but I’m going to be practical. I'm just going to finish up here first, so I'll be a few more days; I was gone too long and have a bit to sort out. Do you want to start looking for a place over there for me, something you'd really like?"
I wasn’t going to be able to get rid of this smile on my face for a while now.
"How much do you want to spend Gabe?"
"No budget Hannah, whatever it costs to get something you really like."
My thoughts were already ticking over; something close to the beach would be nice, the kids would love that, but a leafy suburb so Gabe could go out whenever he wanted. I was happy now; this was exactly what I wanted.
"I love you, Gabriel." I said.
"And I you, with all my heart Hannah; forever and always. See you soon." he replied.
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